1. You fantasise about everyone but the person you're withFantasising about and being attracted to other people is completely normal, but at least some of those fantasies should involve your other half.
2. You're not attracted to themNeed we say more? To connect sexually, you need to feel attraction towards your partner, whether it's on a physical, emotional or intellectual level.
3. They make you feel bad about your bodyIf your partner behaving in a way that makes you feel self-conscious, the sex won't be half as good as when you're with someone who makes you feel as beautiful as you are.
4. Awkward sex noises make you wish the ground would swallow you wholeThose noises happen and sex should be fun. Be with someone who can laugh them off with you.
5. The thought of telling them what you like (and don't like) is mortifying...You're terrified that they'll laugh at you or not care about your needs.
6. ... Which means you spend a whole section of foreplay wishing it could just be overNot everyone likes neck-kissing, okay?
7. The sex is all about themEvery. Single. Time. A good partner will be just as keen to please you as you are to please them.
8. You get up an hour before them to apply a full face of makeup before they wake upIf they're not down with your bare-faced beauty - and you ARE gorgeous - show 'em the door.
9. You're in a friends with benefits situation, and one of you wants moreIf you're both keen to keep things casual, then keep doing what you're doing. But if one of you has feelings, and the other one doesn't, it's a recipe for disaster.
10. You feel awkward or unhappy afterwardsEuphoric, satisfied and bit tingly? Great. Sad, uncomfortable or awkward? Not so great.
11. Your partner is a douchebagThis should be a no-brainer. No matter how good the sex is, if they treat you badly, it's just not worth it. There are plenty of people who are good in bed and don't behave like total douchebags.
12. They refuse to wear a condom when you ask them toSee number 11, above. They definitely fit that criteria.
13. You flinch when they touch youNow, sometimes there be an explanation - you're ticklish or have hands-off zones, perhaps? - but if you're flinching whenever they touch you, your body might be trying to tell you something.
14. Your partner doesn't respect youWhether you're in a relationship or it's a casual friends with benefits fling, mutual respect and trust are musts between you and the person you're sleeping with.
15. The sex is and always has been boring'Boring' might be the least sexy adjective, ever.
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